A Traditional Dayak Wedding

Day 1: Another Bumpy Ride

A couple weekends ago we had the opportunity to go see a traditional Dayak wedding. Dayak is the local tribe (tribe is the best way I know how to describe it) of the people where I live. A young couple who work at the care centre here were getting hitched! So we traveled once again for hours and hours in the back of a truck down dusty, pot-holed roads. Sarah and I had a grand old time in the back singing very loudly to some very bad songs.

We arrived late at night, but went straight to the festivities. This little village had set up quite the party. All the houses were decorated, there were streamers and banners everywhere, and a big stage set up with singers and dancers. After a quick bite to eat (Indonesians are big on feeding people when you arrive somewhere) we sat down to watch the singing and dancing. Naturally, we got roped into dancing to a couple of songs, very bar-mitzvah-esque, but fun nonetheless. Hey, that kind of rhymed. That night, the first tradition they partake in, is the families, followed by basically the whole village, follow the soon-to-be-newlyweds down to the river, carrying large baskets of uncooked rice. They wash the rice in the river and say some prayers and then back to dancing! We finally trudged back own the road to they house we were all staying in to finally get some sleep after a long long day.

The men carrying baskets of rice to was in the river

Day 2: Mandi Duluh dan Menikan

A Bath First (a popular Indonesian saying) and A Wedding

The next day was the big wedding day. But first, a quick dip in a river. We once again all piled into the truck and drove out of the village to a beautiful clearing that in the wet season is a huge lake. We then drove through another, even tinier village to the river. It was one of the most beautiful spots I’ve seen in Indonesia so far. A nice river, a quaint village, and a beautiful view. We all jumped in and swam around and jumped in again. Incredibly refreshing!! It turned out later that kids HAD in fact seen some little crocodiles in that same river a few days earlier, but hey, we didn’t know that then, so… ignorance is bliss is this case.

 

After changing into our party clothes, we walked down the road to the wedding. There was more singing and dancing as the couple and their parents sat on a separate little stage and received guests. It seems like an incredibly long and tedious day for them. The bride actually changed gowns three times throughout the day. I can’t express in words how much food there was. They cook pounds and pounds of rice, some in HUGE woks outside over a fire, and some cooked in bamboo. The bamboo rice is sweetened with some coconut. We watched the old women stir the rice and ceremoniously unwrap the bamboo rice and cut the long tubes into smaller pieces for everyone to eat. They also cook these pancake-like things that are cooked in so much oil they were actually hard to eat. These two old ladies sat for hours and hours cooking thousands of these pancakes. They ushered us into the house a couple of times to eat these giant pancakes.

Sweet rice, wrapped in leaves, cooked in bamboo

The rice is cooked in these bamboo trunks

After a quick nap and break from the festivities, the traditional ceremonies began around 3 pm. The bride, her maid of honor, the groom, and his best man got all dressed up in traditional Dayak dress, and their arms, legs, and facse were all painted. The bride and her maid of honor sat in her house, while the groom and his best man, followed by the men of the village, walked from his house to hers to ‘pick her up’ for the wedding. They all sat in the house for a while as everyone crowded around taking pictures, all the while the elders of the village played some drums, and the wedding party was blessed.

Then everyone, the wedding party, their families, and the entire village, walked in a procession, again while loud drums were playing, down the street to a traditional Dayak ‘pondok’, or long house. Here the wedding party walked around the house three times before entering.

Everyone crowded into this tiny room, which was basically turned into a sauna. We stood around the room just DRIPPING in sweat. It was rather disgusting. The bride, her maid of honor, the groom, and his best man all sat on the floor with two elders, who blessed them with prayers, talked to them about the commitments of marriage, blessed them by putting rice on their heads (not sure the exact significance of this since the language barrier got in the way here). The bride and groom then said some things and exchanged eating a hot chili with each of their mothers. Then there was lots of clapping and hooting which led me to believe that they were officially married now. The whole ceremony was very very cool to witness; it was both intimate and shared with the whole village and guests, and unlike anything I could have ever seen elsewhere. The young now-married couple looked incredibly happy.

Then the real party began. Back in the main house, the old guys sat down to play some more drums while everyone crowded in again. Everyone got a few dabs of paint on the face, and the dancing began! Four people stand in the center of the room and traditionally dance but tapping some feet and kind of waving arms. Meanwhile, everyone else walks/dances around the room in a conga-line like procession, banging their feet to the beat. This goes on for hours. HOURS. Just walking in a circle, packed in this little room, everybody sweating profusely. It was heaps fun but also a little gross. The drinking finally started then too. They make this sweet rice-wine like alcohol drink that they hand to you as you go around and around the room. We did this off and on for the rest of the evening.

Sarah and I with Pak Bohap, Dr. G's husband and newly appointed King of the Dayaks

Day 3: More Pancakes 
 
In the morning we at some more oily pancakes, bought some traditional Dayak machetes, then piled in again for the 5 hour bumpy ride home.

Me, Sarah, and Ritwan, one of our best local friends hanging out at the wedding